Doomed Cannon Fodder Ficklets
by chicaalterego
Summary: First of a Series of Oneshot Ficklets in honor of my new 3rd favorite novel ever: Doomed Cannon Fodder. Expect lots of mindlessness and fluff. Currently airing: A Summer's Love.


**Disclaimer:** Don't own. Don't care. Fritting this for free.

 _Fanfiction Request from Solomaize:_

Snu snu.  
You can pick the couple.  
｡･ﾟﾟ*(/)*ﾟﾟ･｡

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Chapter ?: A Summer's Love.

Love is a powerful force, capable of uniting the most unlikely pairings. It cares not about age, family name or status. Love makes the heart flutter like butterfly wings in the summer wind and flowers bloom... but love can also birth despair and loneliness; and instead of warm happiness it brings the cold feeling of being left behind.

This is the story of a love that lived only at summer time. A love of that was bound to be by nature, but a love that could not last by the same nature that birthed it.

This is the story of a first love.

The story of a young heart that was broken to pieces.

...

It started a bright summer day in Prince Li's manor. The lonely Winter Garden pavilion was far apart from most of the household, and the peace and quiet lured quite a few birds and bugs to the flower garden outside Long Heng's favorite concubine had planted, making the whole place fill with the happy feeling that births new love.

On the little wood house slept Bai Xiangxiu, who neither the light of the rising sun tricking through the window, nor the song of birds had been enough to wake her up that day, as she lied exhausted, wrapped in a pair of muscular arms that weighed as much as a mountain.

It was way past breakfast time, and though the couple in the bed didn't seem to be suffering for the delay in their first food intake of the day; on the next room, sitting on the windowsill, a little cactus had his little cactus tummy rumble. So thirsty!

"Mistress, Huo'er is thirsty!" Huo'er cried, but his whimpering whine wasn't enough to call his mistress back from the land of dreams. Huo'er quietly sobbed a few more minutes to no avail. Knowing for a fact then that he would have to wait for the "mean man who makes mistress cry" to go away before he could drink, Huo'er pouted in his little cactus heart.

The pout on his heart vanished, though, as Huo'er saw the most amazing thing he had ever seen before: a ladybug. Having growing up in the desert, Huo'er had only ever seen ugly bugs flying in the sky... no, not only those bugs looked ugly, but even the butterflies with their colorful satin-like wings paled against the cuteness of the small ladybug, that was so tiny even a small cactus like Huo'er looked formidable in comparison.

"Hello!" Huo'er greeted the little bug that danced in the air. But, instead of coming close, the little lady bug danced away to play with others of its kind...

But, even if for humans all ladybugs look the same, Huo'er knew the first one he saw was special... It was, after all, his first love.

"Ladybug come here! Come play with Huo'er!" He would sometimes call, but it would not be lured by Huo'er's promises. The little cactus was at a loss: it had offered to share his flowerpot, promised that it would share the water his mistress would bring him!

It was then that a memory came to mind. A memory of the mean man giving flowers to Huo'er's mistress and her looking a bit happy.

So Huo'er started working really hard to make a flower for the ladybug! Huo'er urged the floor to be born faster, so much so, that the itch of birthing flowers felt a lot more like a pounding headache.

But it would be worth it to see his ladybug come and sit on his head.

Then, from that day on, their true love romance would start! The ladybug would dance for him and he would lend him his flower to rest. Then, during the nights, Huo'er would tell the ladybug tales of his lonely days at the dessert, and his happy days under Mistress care.

And so, Huo'er used cactus magic to make a flower bloom in a matter of minutes, then he looked at the sky in hopes to see his one true love come to him at least.

And it did! The ladybug in Huo'er's heart danced its little dance towards him!

He was so happy!

The little bug was on top of his flower! And it tickled so much it made him laugh... until it started going a bit deeper...

"Ahhhh! You can't! We just meet today!" Huo'er wailed in horror! Huo'er had learned a lot about romance from watching his Mistress and the Mean Man, so Huo'er knew that first they needed to spend time together, eat together, speak to each other...

But ladybugs know nothing about romance.

And so, Huo'er's flower was profaned by the ladybug!

Huo'er tried to reason with it, to make it stop; but it actually felt a bit good... then...

Huo'er couldn't think straight as it experienced the wonders of the snu snu of plant life: pollination.

When the ladybug was done eating it flew up, and a dazed Huo'er watched it dance in the sky to a beat that matched that of his heart...

But then! BETRAYAL!

The ladybug danced to next plant, then went from there from flower to flower, all the while Huo'er could do nothing but watch as it feasted and showed the rest of the blooming plants the joys of an act that should have been only theirs to share.

Huo'er's little cactus heart was broken beyond repair. And then, when it had it's fill, the little ladybug was gone with the wind.

Huo'er sobbed and sobbed from true pain and despair. Sadly, the tragedy was not yet over. As if pulled by the allure of Huo'er's handsome flower, all the other tiny ladybugs in the garden copied the actions of the first. And so they came to him to take their fill, making his tears stop from the joys of *cough* that, then crushed the hope of they giving him true love as they feasted on the next flower and the next.

By the end of the hour Huo'er was in a daze; it felt both crushed and oddly sated. And yet, his naive little heart was smashed into smitterns.

Poor Huo'er... love was given to him and ripped away too rashly, too abruptly.

There truly isn't any love story more tragic than that of a magical cactus!

...

Bai Xiangxiu woke up from Long Heng's arms with a start as she heard a wail so pitiful her body unconsciously suppressed the need to relieve herself by doing her daily ablutions.

Long Heng woke up with a jump too, alert and protective upon hearing the fright in Bai Xiangxiu's panicked voice as the woman he loved ran with such a haste she had even forgotten to put any clothes on... not that he minded the view, but if someone else's eyes glanced upon her soft skin he would pluck their eyes out!

Bai Xiangxiu fretted, ignoring anything but her wailing Huo'er, who sobbed about his tragic love. Unable to stop herself from comforting him, she blabbered about love not being everything in the world, about there being many other fishes in the sea to love, how sex can mean nothing for women these days and about how a person didn't need a person to love to spend a happy life!

But... such modern wisdom was said in front of the extreme possessive Long Heng.

And so, before Bai Xiangxiu could celebrate about Huo'er's slightly improved mood, she was embraced forcefully by the unstoppable male lead!

"Such daring words, I believe such a thing should be corrected."

Bai Xiangxiu paled, her pleas for mercy muffled ignored as she was taken back to the bed.

...Maybe an amendment of the earlier claim is needed: "There truly isn't any love story more tragic than that of a magical cactus... except that of a magical cactus' _owner_ ".

 _The End._

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 **AN:** I know, solomaize, you clearly loved- _**ah! Don't hit me!**_

 _PS: I DO know ladybugs don't really pollinate flowers... but I tried to picture butterflies there, and I felt it was kind of creepy... I don't like those TBH._


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